Of Bibs and Binkies

Dan and LuAnn

(by Julie Smith 2-14-2003)

The day had come
For Dan to summon
All the fair maids
In the royal kingdom.

Now Dan appeared
Very strange and weird
For he wore a bib
Beneath his beard.

None of the maids were to his liking
They were dull and far from striking.
But lo, at the back of the line
He beheld a young lady Viking.

“Step forth,”
He said with mirth,
“The one in the back!
I’ve found a queen at last!”

“Mayhap you have,”
Replied his dad,
“But she’s got a bottle
In her hand.”

“Tell me you name,
And don’t be ashamed.”
Dan gently coaxed.
“LuAnn is my name, oh King.”

“Listen here,
My dear.”
Said Dan
Scratching his ear.

“If you’re in your teens
And still not weaned,
How could you
Be my queen?”

“Oh, but Dan,”
Replied LuAnn
Through spouts of tears,
“I surly can!”

“I’ll leave my bottle and mum,
And even stop sucking my thumb!”
I just want you,
The rest I’ll shun!”

“Very well,” Dan said,
“Now let’s be wed!
Put a binky in her mouth
And a crown on her head!”